Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Coocoo for a cocoa clipping!

My wife, Jane the Voodoo Queen, gave me a clipping from a recent catalog she received of a, um--well, I'll say interesting candy product for sale. I scanned it for you:

You see the "interesting" part? No? Here, I'll circle it:

That's right. Fifteen dollars for approximately the same amount as four-and-a-half regular chocolate bars. But that's because of it's special ingredient: positive energy (or "intention" as it says on the front label) from Tibetan monks! Well, that's a bargain! It won't repel Chinese soldiers, but it'll make your chocolate better, somehow!

TDSH has been contacted by food inspectors, who report that the latest batch of Intentional Chocolate is subject to a voluntary recall. Several customers have complained of having their mellow harshed after eating the metaphysically-infused candy. It is believed that uncontained bad vibes from some disgruntled employees at the packing plant contaminated several lots. Bummer!

If you have bought any of this chocolate since Jan. 2, 2010, you may get a refund by calling 1-800-555-HAHAHA.

Personally, I've always preferred Cadsburied, the haunted dark chocolate bar.


Ubermilf said...

This chocolate choked my chakras! I demand a refund!

Mark said...

At the dollar store you can find cheap Unintentional Chocolate.

Laura said...

It's a good thing that they didn't have me working the line when I had my last episode of PMS!

You think there are too many wars now... :P

That was hilarious! Thanks for the giggle.



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