The glass is half empty-- and fulla poison!

I was talking to a friend the other day who is somewhat cynical and misanthropic. He likes to play grump. So I told him that I was founding a holiday just for people like him called "National Curmudgeon's Day", and one of its traditions would be this exchange of holiday greetings:

"Happy Curmudgeon's Day!"

"F__k you!"

(Other suitable replies would be "Up yours!" and "Get lost!")

Anyone have dates they want to suggest for this new holiday? (Y'know, I think this is a possible marketing bonanza. Who wouldn't want to celebrate a holiday where you're expected to be at your grouchiest?)

At the Universal Monster Army group, we had something similar. After the film Van Helsing came out, there was so much vitriolic debate about the movie that Terry Ingram and I had to figure out some way, as moderators, to diffuse the situation. People were getting upset. So Terry declared that there would be ONE day of no moderation, where anyone could say anything, no-holds-barred. I dubbed it "Van Helsing Day" (man, am I imaginative!) and encouraged everyone to push the insults to historic extremes. I mean, say the most absolutely mean things you could about another member. And people did. It worked out the way I had hoped-- it was funny! And no one quit the group in a huff.

So if you're still reading this, I say, "Get bent, you time-wasting, mouthbreathing, pencil-necked, circus peanut-sucking Neanderthal!"